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Aug. 12th, 2006

friends

(no subject)

i just got a new cell number so disregard my old 413 number because this is my new number\
wicked

(no subject)

tonight my mom is making me go to this stupid teen beach party with my sister and brother and i know my mom has my best intrest  in but the last thing i want to do is spend my time at this patetic attempt to get  teens in community together and out of trouble i just think its stupid but what do i know

tell me what you think should i go or what

Aug. 7th, 2006

friends

(no subject)

i hate my family and aperantly they hate me too

my sister came home from working at a camp and i thought it would be nice to see my sister before she went back to college but no one minute with her is like being around a very moody person one second she is nice to me the next she hates me and the next she yells at me like i did something wrong to hurt her and her life because of course the world does revolve around her  duh

my brother has gotten even more annoying and feels that every second he needs to do something that will either hurt my feelings or make me laugh then cry and run up to my room (which my sister has mastered also) he laughed at me when my mom said i couldnt get a job until my grades were up i had a 3.0 4th quater and she said it was okay ........... to me a 3.0 was the best i could have done at the time even with the news of bye MA and hello VA were i had the worst years of my life 

my parents like so much more out of me and i cant anymore they also have found a new way to ignore me whenever i try to talk they talk right over me or dont listen because its just megan talking like who cares about you kind of vibe coming out of them at dinner i asked about 20 questions and i got one or two answered yeah sad 

i mostly spend all my time in my room because right now i am the only one that loves me right now..........................i feel so unloved and unwanted its making me feel depressed and i dont want to talk to some stranger i want to talk to my parents but they are to busy fullfilling my sisters dream and my brothers dream to even notice that i am sad or that i am crying (to them it just looks like i am napping or asleep) 

right now i might take a break from lj because i cant sit on my ass all day waiting for someone to talk to me or listen to me so miss you all and hope you miss me so bye for now

Aug. 6th, 2006

friends

life on alien planet

hey whats up everyone updating on my life i just got back from a weekend at my grandmas (they were having no sales tax on school supplies and clothes so very usefull i got 3 pairs of pants 1 demin 1 brown and 1 capri a pretty white tunic with green embrodary and some tank tops) i also had to stay to drive my sister home since she didnt know the way 

i got the coolest curtians for myy room they are blue with other colors they are indian looking so they are cool

my school has a photography class so i am hoping to take and they have a algedra 2 trig class that i am hoping to take also

thats about it for now and i miss everyone so much and i know warp tour is coming and i really want to go

Aug. 3rd, 2006

friends

life part 3

life has goten better for me 

yesterday i got contacts yes thats right megan has gotten contacts they are so cool but it is had to get used to putting them in it took me about ten minutes to put them in this morning you have to focus on putting the contact in straight and not let it touch anything but your eye taking them out is easy =)

i went to dinner with my cousins and my uncle and aunt and my cousins remembered who i was that might not seem like much to you but to me being in mass it was so far away from them and i didnt see them as much so it was cool that they remembered me 

tomorrow i am going out to shop for school clothes near my grandmas house because they have no tax on all school clothes which is cool

my mom gave me ten dollars to eat 3 pices of callimare because i had never tasted them and i asked if they were good and my mom made a bet with me 1 because i was broke and 2 because she wanted me to try new things i am now ten bucks richer woot woot 

life is good right now (better) i am eating more but i still skip lunch because i am usually not hungry and i am not eating when i am not hungry so it works out 

i hope you all are doing good and i miss you guys so much and love ou all wish you were here to give support when i need it but  its okay

Aug. 1st, 2006

friends

donk know anymore

recently i have been not hungry and dont like to eat and me normally i eat but i barely eat anything all day and when my parents are around i have to force myself to eat i have no clue what is happening to me all day i feel sick to my stomach and if i do get hungry i dont eat

maybe its just moving jitters and being scared of what will happen next but i dont know 

now that this is happening to me i am scared even more that somehing is happening to me....yes i would like to loose a few pounds for school but i never thought i would resort to not eating

my brother wven asked me what was worng and  why i dont eat and i dont know i cant seem to answer that question and i am scaring myself 

my brother is signing at the top of his lungs right now and let me tell u it isnt pretty sounding and its quiet funny 

any way back to my problem i guess im doing it because of pressure to be thin but i have always accepted myself like i am so i cant understand why i am doing this its kind of like someone else has entered my body and is taking over me and right now i dont like it very much

please help i need a ton of advice right now i hate forcing myself to eat

Jul. 31st, 2006

friends

life part 2

okay right now i cant complain anymore i have an eye doctor appt which will determine if i can get contacts or not hopefully i can 

life on this alien state is getting better though i am still loney as for the friends thing i am decinding to stick with just waiting for school to start and then i can make my self look werid all i want than god i have another year (after this one) to put up with my parents i cant wait for college

my week is booked up becides the eye appt i am haveing dinner wensdayy with my aunt and uncle at joes crab shack thrusday right now nothing friday im going back to my grandmas house to shop for school clothes (curses to public schools like the uniform better) and then i might saty there for the weekend till my sister whos at camp can come back to my house and i am her navigator ......... she has no sence of direction what so ever so that will be fun then that tuesday of next week i have this stupid guidence conslor meeting at my new school to get me and my bro signed up for now thats my life busy busy busy oh yeah in between everything is clean unpack and shop for stuff we need ( im getting no sleep)

just thought i would update as for my last entry im sticking it out here for the time being but i would like for people to call me so i dont get that loney!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =D 

love all of you and miss you so much

Jul. 27th, 2006

friends

life

okay im back just got dsl into my new house ............... thats right we go the house we put an offer in and now it is up to us to paint, fix and paint nice isnt it ......... for me right now its hell (we pretty much had to paint everyroom)

my room has 2 walls white and 2 walls pink the white walls ar going to be memory wall and a calligraphy wall 

my brothers room is going from bright neon green to a porpouse gray and painted turtle..........dont ask me

my sisters room is going from an ugly bright purple to sopmething have no clue yet\



my school that i am going to is forest park high school ---- deja vou ---- kind of 

( the truth im scared to do anything) (i dont know how to make friends or where to find them i feel like my life doesnt mean anything anymore i go to bed everynight thinking of wha could happen to me and everysituation isnt pretty i either end up dead or in acoma or in a shrink for good.....its not pretty) (i miss everyone up in MA and i cant help but wonder if i cpuld run away from this place back up there and then my life might make some sence) ( i dont like it here at all sometimes i think that im better off if i just die because everything i do here has lead me into a bigger hole that right now i cant get out of and i think that dieing is the only way out of it)  ( but im still alive wasting away here hopeing someone will rescue  me and take me to someplace [canada perhaps] but for now the only hope i have is my two white walls in my room)

now for happier things...i went to see footlose the musical dude it was awsome the lead split his pants and it was funny 

we got all of the boxes the day after we moved in which was the 20th of july

for now thats it i have to go

Jul. 13th, 2006

friends

life

hey i decided to update you on my "wonderful life" so far 

nothing has happened ... sorry 

we are waiting to see if we can get the house we wanted on the 19th (knock on wood) 

i have to pick out paint colors for my room because my mom doesnt like the color that is in their now (if we get the house)

i went to wally world (wallmart) yesterday and i bought Breakfast club and debated on buying footloose...didnt bummber

i might go on saturday to go and see footloose as a musical with my mom and grandma at this high school or college or something should be fun

while i am at my grandmas i am trying to take tours of colleges (hasnt happened yet) that i might be interseted in appling to

my bro is in basketball camp from 2-8 which leaves me home with my mom from that time still debating if it is good or not (plus camp is over with

my grandma and pop pop are coming home today from a trip to nashville or something so 

im still trying to prusuade my mom that seeing a movie is good (that nhasnt happened yet ) 

i have driven pretty much everyday not on the highway but on roads !!!!! it was so much fun i had my first person pass me and i went over my first bridge and railroad track.................sounds dumb but it was cool for me 


well thats all i can think of for now  more later i hope

Jul. 8th, 2006

friends

something stef L. sent to me

i found this in the mail and i thought it was cute and cool

LET'S SEE IF YOU READ YOUR MAIL




What would you do if every time you wanted someone they would never be
there? 







What would you do if for every moment you were truly happy there would
be 10 moments of sadness? 





What would you do if your best friend died tomorrow and you never got to tell them how you felt?





So, I just wanted to say, even if I never talk to you again in my life,
you are special to me and you have made a difference in my life.







I look up to you, respect you, and truly cherish you.











Send this to all your friends, no matter how often you talk, or how
close you are, and send it to the person who sent it to you.
 







Let old friends know you haven't forgotten them, and tell new friends
you never will.






Remember, everyone needs a friend, someday you might feel like you have
NO FRIENDS at all, just remember this e-mail and take comfort in knowing somebody out there cares about you and always will.




In times of trouble,
In times of need,
If you are feeling SAD,








You can count on me.
I will give you a wink,






Until you smile,








give you a hug,








And stand by your side.





I'll be there for you till the end, I'll always and forever, be your friend!




INSTANTLY WHEN YOU RECEIVE THIS,
YOU MUST SEND IT TO AT LEAST 10 FRIENDS,
INCLUDING THE PERSON WHO SENT IT TO YOU!

 

 

 

 

 



It's true, sometimes we forget to tell our special people that we love them.

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